Promoting Allergy Compassion – Our Testimony

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May is Asthma Awareness Month and I want to take the opportunity to share with you our testimony about how our family deals with food allergies and asthma. I hope to help educate church workers so that they understand the importance of knowing how to help the families they are ministering to. We, as a family, would like to promote allergy compassion because as you can tell, we as a family, all have allergy problems.

I’m calling it compassion because it is more than awareness that is needed. We can be aware of something and not have a heart for it. Genuine compassion is linked to the heart and does what it can to meet the needs of people where they are.

AsthmaMeet my oldest son, Uno, he is 7 years old and has asthma, severe peanut, nut, and milk allergies. He is a special boy, as most first children are, he is who made my husband and I parents. We have a family history of allergies on both sides of our family. My husband and his family have the asthma. I have the milk allergy that manifests itself in eczema that breaks out in various places on my body. I also have idiopathic angioedema, which is allergy outbreaks of an unknown cause that can happen any time without warning.

As you can probably tell our son is wearing an oxygen tube across his nose, this picture was taken over a month ago. He had RSV when he was around 4 months old and was hospitalized and since that point he has struggled with asthma. It took many years to finally get his allergies figured out and his asthma in control.

Uno, at 7 years old, is very aware of when he is left out because someone has brought a treat that has milk in it. He is human and gets disappointed when he cannot take part in what the other kids are doing. Sometimes it means he has to sit out while others are playing a game because we notice he has begun to wheeze.

We first figured out about Uno’s milk allergy at church. When he began going to the 2-year-old class he began eating new snacks. When we came home we began noticing he was sick, sometimes spiking a 104 temperature, struggling to breathe, etc. It would take several days for him to recover, sometimes a trip to the ER, then we would return back to church on Wednesday night and the cycle would start all over again to where we would be better by Sunday and he would be down for the count again. The culprit: the new snacks, goldfish crackers! The nursery coordinator quickly labeled the box of goldfish with a tag that said “Do Not Give to Uno.” We stopped having complications on a regular basis.

Aug 2006

While visiting my mother and grandmother in my hometown we learned Uno had an allergy to peanuts. I had a sneaking suspicion but it finally came to light on that trip. My grandmother’s aunt, in her late 70’s, took Uno up in her arms, he was probably 18 months old, and fed him some toast with peanut butter on it. I had been aware of his skin turning red when he was given peanut butter, and was noticing that the edges of his mouth were beginning to turn pink where the peanut butter had touched him. We were trying to tell her not to give him any more when she told us that he was fine. He was not fine. It was from that moment on that I refused to give him peanut butter at all. I always imagined that if peanut butter was making his skin red, what was it doing to him on the inside? His allergy was confirmed with a skin test, where immediately when pricked the area turned as large as a quarter.

Our son depends on other people at times to help him be safe from those things that would cause him harm. It hurts our hearts when people disregard his safety because it could potentially mean life or death for him. Uno when exposed to milk gets an irritation in his throat, and from that he begins to cough, and that is when his cough-induced asthma kicks in, and at times can overtake him in a matter of minutes. He can go from being fine to having pneumonia and needing around the clock treatments within a few hours. It is imperative for others to understand this about him and take precautionary measures to help and protect him. When it comes to nuts we do not know the outcome to his being exposed, neither do we want to find out! That is when allergy compassion makes a difference.

We would never tell a child to cross a four lane highway at rush hour, but we will sometimes expose allergic children to their food allergies. When we become aware and we are educated about these things then we become responsible, and when we become responsible, we become accountable. I urge all people, whether you have allergies in your family or not, put forth the extra effort to understand them.

We have noticed that some people could really care less about Uno’s allergies because they do not have allergies or have them in their family. Often times it feels like if it does not affect them then it does not mean anything to them. If it was their allergy or their family member with the allergy then I imagine that it would become a more prominent focus in their lives. They would have understanding and compassion toward others that struggle… or at least we hope they would.

We have found others with a heart full of compassion toward him and a willingness to learn about which foods contain milk and the importance not to have peanut butter around Uno at all. When a mom approaches me and asks me what type of snack Uno can have in their Sunday School class, then it blesses my heart and gives me confidence that that mother would take care of my child responsibly. Other people have been kind to ask us ahead of time what we can and cannot have so that when we go over to their home for a meal they have planned a meal for him or allowed me the opportunity to be able to bring something that he can eat safely.

Uno would change having asthma if he could and he would try peanut butter and sunflower seeds if he could, but God has allowed his allergies for a reason. We don’t understand why, many times we don’t like it, but it is our life. His food allergies have become who we are and what we eat. We are the people who do not eat pizza, or lunch meat, or most processed foods or bread. We stay inside during the windy days of Spring and Fall, and have him cover his mouth when he is out in cold air because these things effect his asthma. Our lives are different because of the allergies but we are better because of it.

We share these stories and thoughts for not only Uno’s sake but for other people. Maybe we would not have a heart or understanding for people who have physical problems and diseases if we did not face them regularly. This is not a pity party on our part, it is the origin of our education on this topic. I hope in the future we will be able to help you incorporate and maintain allergy awareness in a number of practical ways by teaching you to be more compassionate and aware of how to run a ministry that can minister to those with allergies.

Dear Children: Love Letters From Mama Vol. 2

Love Letters Vol 2

This is a series of letters that I have written to my children in a journal. Most of the letters are written to teach them in the future.  I hope you enjoy reading them!

Kids,

Life is hard sometimes and we cannot understand why other people do what they do. Sometimes it’s a hurtful thing someone says to you, or someone not making what you’re interested in doing, a priority to them. And sadly there will be times when people are not as kind or godly as they seem to be.

What you CAN do is not focus so much on finding out why they did this or that or did not do it, but pray for them. Ask God to help them, or better yet, ask God if there is something you can do to help them.

Others sometimes get so absorbed in the things in their life that they don’t realize what they are doing to you. It doesn’t make it right or fair, but we have to ask God to help us rise above the hurt and be a blessing if we can. Relationships at times must change because of violations of friendship or boundaries but it does not mean we have to hate people or count them as useless. God will help you during these times.

Love,                                                                                                                               Mama

Kids~

“Why do you like the name Mama?” you might ask. I like Mama much better than Mommy, because it can be used until I die. The name Mommy to me sounds like a name a baby would call their mother. My aim is to help you all grow up into mature adults, not remain a baby in your thinking or the things you do,or even the way you come to me throughout your life. You are all special to me and my hope is that you will have a name to call me that fits who you will become, not just who you are now. I hope that makes sense.

Love,                                                                                                                               Mama

Dear Children~

Each day God is my teacher and He teaches me something.

Mothers are never failures if they stop working a job to come home and focus on their family. And education does not have to be gained in a classroom setting. Where women are, they, if the desire lives in their hearts, will succeed.

Working at learning balance, adjusting to the events of the day, knowing what to say at the right time to a specific person or need, finding a way to try to get housework done, and love enough to fill everyone’s basic needs is just a handful of the responsibilities.

God has given me a heart for mothering you and I pray He will allow me to be a part of your lives until I can see you all succeed.

Love,
Mama

To read The Ministry Mama’s other letters to her children, click here.

Dear Children Series: Love Letters from Mama

Love Letters From Mama

Have you ever loved someone so much that you want to scream from mountain tops and in the streets and tell everyone you meet, friends and strangers alike how much you love them!? I love my husband, he is wonderful, he is who God made me to be one with, I LOVE HIM! And I love my children!

Some nights before bed I write in a journal, that my mother gave me. It is blue with yellow and orange sunshines with smiling faces on the cover. It is rather cheesy looking but it was the empty book I needed to begin writing my memories to the kids. I write to each child individually and then sometimes when I want to share a life lesson I begin the letter with “Dear Children.” That has inspired the Dear Children Series that I am sharing with you today.

These letters are my outward screams into the world of how much I love them, how I want them to learn from my life’s successes and failures. It is a venue in which I can share lessons about life I want to teach them. The children are young and do not understand everything I want to teach them just yet but some day I hope they grow to read the letters and appreciate them.

I am a little morbid at times and I think, “If something ever happens to me how will my children know that I love them?” If they have a journal they can read and learn about funny things they did as children and stories about our every day life then they will know because I wrote it down for them that it was valuable to me. Then they never have to worry or doubt my love. I can speak to them from the pages. They will be love letters from Mama.

Here are a couple of letters to start off the series.

Children~
My hope for you all is that you love one another your whole life. That you will not fight or hate one another, but rather fight FOR each other. The relationship you have is given to you by God. I hope your childhood and Christian upbringing will unite you and keep you glued together.

So many families are broken to pieces and siblings hurt each other through angry and jealous words. I hope and pray that for generations God will speak and move you to do His work. I never want you to violate each other’s relationship because you take each other for granted and are unthankful.

Love one another and do good.

Love you,
Mama

Kids~
God has been working in my heart about my joyfulness, that it might be a light to your souls that makes you feel loved and welcome in our home. That my eye might not be so critical but loving and full of brightness as you enter the room.

God is showing me the importance of simplicity in the home so that we do not have to constantly be focused on clutter and messes. I may not always be a good example of joy because my bent is to take care of “things” and do things alone.

The Bible makes a comment that the barren woman becomes the joyful mother of children. This was pointed out in a book I was reading by Elizabeth George called A Woman After God’s Own Heart. May the Lord help me to learn to be full of the joy of my salvation that I might minister to you in the right spirit.

Writing for my children has helped me at the end of some days write down the great moments when it may feel like chaos has reigned supreme for 12 hours straight.

I encourage you to write things down for your children on a regular basis. It will bring your heart great delight because you can see how God is working in your family and how your children are growing. I even write little notes to my husband in this book. I figure some time I will share what is inside to surprise him… but not yet!

I hope that you will follow us thorough the Dear Children Series: Love Letters from Mama and that it will give you ideas on how to bless your children through the gift of writing.

Smiles,

The Ministry Mama