Tag: ministry

A “Fruitless” Sunday

Fruitless Sunday

Quick Family Update: We are now working in a church plant ministry in the southwest and have been since March 2016. We hold our services in a local elementary school. We travel around 30 minutes to services on Sundays and meet in the pastor’s home on Wednesday nights. We are still living with my in-laws which is allowing our children special time to spend with their grandparents. My husband serves as the assistant pastor leading music and teaching the adult Sunday School class while also working a full-time job. We are all growing and enjoying the new experience church planting really is… this story is from a “fruitless” Sunday this summer!

The plan was to have a Sunday morning “Fun Day,” a morning Vacation Bible School type service in hopes to meet people in our community. Our little church plant had a group of eight teenagers and four adults come for a week on a missions trip. Throughout the week we went out in the blistering heat and passed out flyers in the neighborhoods surrounding the elementary school where we meet. The teens practiced special music weeks ahead before they arrived and did fundraising for their trip well in advance.

Canvassing for our upcoming event

Meeting and planning where we will put out flyers

The week before our event…

The sun was wearing us out within two hours of putting out flyers. Water bottles were in high demand. I took all five of our children out two days of four to put out flyers on doors. It was hard to get through those two smaller neighborhoods without sweaty foreheads and pink cheeks close to being overheated even though we stopped toward the end every five minutes for a drink. Our Tres (nickname for 3rd child), who is six years old and learning to read, began recognizing the “No Soliciting” signs that were dispersed along the neighborhood doors. Our baby rode along in the stroller playing with a little monkey key chain, I was constantly adjusting the shade over her to keep her feet from being sunburned. The teenagers did more leg work but came to the end of the mornings just as drained. When the afternoons came, they crashed into a heap taking naps on the couches because the heat had zapped their energy. The flyers were distributed and a few contacts had been made.

The day of our event…

Two hours before the service we were setting up around the school for the fun water games. Water balloons and other supplies were ready, ice in ice chests for snow cones, two lessons ready for younger and older children. We waited in anticipation.

Several people waited outside the school gates to welcome visitors but no one came.

No one.

Not one kid, adult, or new guest at all.

My heart had built up an anticipation for multiple visitors so when no people came it was a crash of disappointment. I won’t lie, I am human, and a woman with emotions. I was disheartened. I wanted to cry for everyone who put forth all the effort. I was not disappointed in God but surprised at our results. I tried reading the faces of the other adults as the morning service time came and our services began with just our small handful of church folk.

Were we really okay with what looked like an event of menial proportions?

The answer is yes,  we were okay. The group went on with the program with our children (our children plus the pastor’s children = 8) They still played the games planned, ate the snow cones, gave away the candy prizes and did the “Grand Prize” drawings that had been advertised in our flyers. Most importantly they went on with the Bible lesson and the youth pastor spoke about “The Greatest Gift Ever Given.” Almost all of our children have given a profession of faith except our Cuatro (4 year old). We all needed the reminder of Christ’s gift of His own precious life dying on the cross for our sins that day.

The youth group treated our “ministry kids” as if they were just as important as any visitor.  The pastor and the group did not just drop the program because guests did not arrive. It could have been easy to throw our hands up in the air and have everyone join in together for the regular church service. Our children were taught ministering to them was important because it’s true: Ministry children are important too.

Sunday night the youth group sang, “If just one more soul were to walk down the aisle, it would be worth every struggle, it would be worth every trial, a lifetime of labor would be worth it all if it rescued just one more soul.” My heart was struck that may not have been our week to rescue one more soul but if in the course of time we see someone saved, a Sunday like that day genuinely would be worth all the efforts.

After Sunday was over…

The thought occurred to me that night as I lie in bed in the twilight of sleep, there was fruit. The fruit of my womb, my children. The fruit of my pastor’s wife’s womb, her children. The fruit of some parents and youth leaders and a pastor in that neighboring state were there ministering to us. The fruit of paFruits of Laborsrents and youth leaders decades ago were there, my husband and I and our pastor and his wife. We are all fruit of labors people invested in our lives for the Lord’s sake. The Lord Himself has been the investor of our lives, nurturing our hearts all along to help us have spiritual growth and understanding. He has been watering, pruning, investing since we were all children to bring us to where we are today. We, the ministers, count as fruit although at first glance the “reward” from the labors for our current day left us seeming empty-handed. The truth was the opposite. The enemy would love for us to discount the Lord’s investment and make us feel like failures.

Church planting is beginning with a bare field and seasons of time include sowing the seed of God’s Word and letting people know you are in the community. To all the church planting families out there I say, keep planting, the Lord will give the increase. Don’t give up on reaching out in the community to all the “neighbors” out there, souls still need Christ no matter your attendance. Compel, sow with energy, pray in earnest with tears, fruit will come in its season.

To all the Ministry Mamas out there I say, even if it is only your children teach the class or run the program! When the church van or bus route is filled only with your children share the joy of the Lord with them and invest in them in a special way. Relish the moments of only watching the few babies in the nursery, laugh and have fun with them for they too need a good experience in learning to love going to church. When your ministry seems to bear no new fruit and no visitors walk through the door or souls come forward in a church service, do your job and leave the rest to God. Value those who are present, they are fruit worth loving and investing in!

 

Encouraging Your Husband When He Feels Like a Ministry Failure

You, as a ministry wife, have an ability to be able to get in behind the scenes and see the real man your husband is and hear his heart in his lowest of times. All of them face times in which they feel like they are a ministry failure.

You and God can make a difference in helping your husband see he is NOT a failure just because times are hard or there is opposition. This is a list that I found that I had written for my husband when he was disheartened over a year ago and thought it might be something worth sharing. When your husband feels like a failure then please encourage him in a special way – share this blog post, or write your own list, or do some of the other things the other ladies suggested below.

Encouraging Your Husband - TMM

This is what I wrote:

5 Reasons Why You Are Not a Ministry Failure

1. Your calling is fulfilled by obedience, not numbers.

2. So much of ministry is not about being busy, but loving God’s people. You have a unique ability to love people and make them feel cared for.

3. Your lows give you humility and a launching pad for future goals – they do not define you, your ministries, or your God.

4. God is not finished with you yet. God won’t be done with you and your duty to follow Him (your ministries) until you see His face.

5. God’s Word accomplishes His purposes – Sown into the hearts of people through the songs the choir sings, your preaching or teaching, or the children’s ministries you have worked in. Make it your responsibility to keep sowing, not weight yourself down with making it grow. God gives the increase.

Encourage yourself in the Lord.

“The Lord shall increase you more and more, you and your children. Ye are blessed of the Lord which made heaven and earth.” Psalm 115:14,15

Love,

Your Girl

 

To expand this thought this question was asked on the Ministry Mamas Facebook page:

If your husband were discouraged today and felt like a failure and you were going to give him a reason why he was NOT a failure, what would that reason be?

This is what some of you had to say:

“He’s doing his best to faithfully follow the path that God has placed before him with the knowledge and experience that God has given him so far, and that’s the best thing that he can do.“

“He has me who is head over heels in love with him as a person not a title, and four healthy happy adjusted children that adore him! …followed by some spontaneous planned affection.”

“When you truly live for God, no one is a failure. Yes we miss the mark but we are never failures in Christ. ”

“God alone is the author & finisher of our faith. He sees the beginning, the ending, and everything in between. We have to focus on the Master of all our circumstances, whether it’s in good times or bad. He works all things together for our good – even when it doesn’t feel like it. We’ve been down this road several times and it’s not ever easy, but in the end…always good.“

“I do believe this is a tool the devil uses to get to our men serving in the ministry. I have had to deal with this a few times in our marriage and these are some things I did to encourage my man: Pray, listen when he wants to talk, be silent when words will only sound like nagging, be there (women are not the only ones who need held sometimes), love him, tell him you love him, show him you love him, write little notes and leave them in places only he will find (underwear/sock drawer, suit coat pocket, wallet, etc.). Knowing you are there at his side through anything will help him get through anything. If he doesn’t ‘thank you’ or acknowledge your acts of encouragement, keep it up he will in time. God might be using this time to not only make him stronger, but you both stronger in faith and your marriage and love for each other.”

“I always think about when David was in such despair after his wife, children and fellow townspeople were taken captive and the people wanted to kill him and he wanted to die. The Bible says he encouraged himself in the Lord. One of the best things for our husbands is to sit together and talk about all the things the Lord has accomplished through them, remember the good times, the lives changed, the blessings He has given us. Just naming the blessings of the current day can help lift the spirits even a little.“

“I read this out loud to my mom and my six-year-old piped up ‘Only Satan wants you to believe you’re a failure but God made you special,’ I think that pretty much sums it up.”

These ladies have good comments and I love to get other perspectives from ladies who have served for different lengths of time in ministry.  For yourself, allow the Holy Spirit to guide you when you have the discernment to see that your husband really needs encouragement. Make sure that you’re sensitive to his sensitivities (in words, things you do, and etc.) and as the Lord leads you, encourage him to keep serving the Lord.

If you have some other ideas, thoughts, or advice on how to encourage your husband when he feels like a failure please leave them in the comments!

 

God’s Missing Children: 3 Things Ministry People Can Do for Them

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I stood staring tonight at the Red Plum ad, a photo had caught my attention of a red-headed young man, 18 years old. He has a beautiful straight smile and looked to be in great health. He has been missing since August of 2013 and in that moment I prayed for him. It struck me as odd that a young man would be missing, as most times the pictures are of little girls or young women, baby boys or toddlers, not teenage young men.

Then my mind wandered on down another trail. What if God wrote up a missing person’s report for all of His children that had gone missing?

God's Missing Children

The predators have taken many of God’s children through many lies and deceits. Other children who did not wish to be found simply disappeared from church and their families, with a heart set on pursuing their own desires. How many of them are in bondage, slaves to the sin of this world, voluntarily or involuntarily? How many of them are wishing for someone to find them again so they can return home?

Do any of God’s children wish to never be found again? How long have they shut out the Father’s cries for their return to Him?

Have others given up hope? What about the parents of those children? or the families and church families that have suffered heartaches through the years knowing their loved one was missing? What do they pray for and sincerely desire?

What does God the Father desire for His missing children?

For their return… the kind of return that reunites and creates a healed bond in fellowship and love. A renewed walk with God that will never cause them to go missing again.

God’s Search Efforts

Luke chapter 15 is the perfect chapter in the Bible that explains God’s different tactics. Verses 1-7 explain the parable of the lost sheep. The shepherd went out to find the lost lamb when he discovered that ninety-nine had returned to the fold and he did not. When he found him, he rejoiced and asked others to rejoice with him because what was lost was now found.

Verses 8-10 tell the story of the woman who had lost one piece of silver and searches her entire home in desperation looking for it. When she discovers it again, she also asks those around her to rejoice that what was lost had been found.

Verses 11-32 tell the familiar story of the prodigal son, who asked for his inheritance and walked away from his father. In his time of riotous living he was lost, but at the most humbling of experiences while found in the pig pen (a vile animal to Jewish people) he comes to himself, and returns to a father waiting with open arms.

The common thread in each of these parables is that the lost possession/person was not really lost to God the Father. The first two had a similar endings where the sheep and coin were searched for. In the prodigal son’s story, the father allowed him to go and did not look for him but instead waited in faith for his return. I think this speaks of how God’s ways of dealing with His missing children are not always the same. Sometimes the missing children will know God is looking for them because the Holy Spirit has gone out to find them, speaking to their hearts in even their sinful situations time and time again, “You’re out here all alone, come home with me.” Other times, the foundation of Biblical knowledge will hit them in the time where they are most humbled, and they will remember the things they have been taught in that moment and make a choice to repent and turn back to the Father. The result, no matter how the Father works in the situations is that the return is to be a joyful event.

How God’s Missing Children Effects Ministry People

In ministry watching God’s children go missing hurts every time. Every saved person that is part of a church family leaves a hole, like a missing puzzle piece, that makes the local church body incomplete. There have been times that in being able to perceive what will likely happen in people’s lives, you can easily become angry at them (like the prodigal son’s brother) for running off and mocking the righteous lifestyle that you are trying to live. Or you become angry at God like Jonah, for giving them another chance when it seems like they have wasted so many resources, time, and relationships. But like God said to Jonah, “Doest thou well to be angry?” (Jonah 4:4 and 4:9). No, we have to keep things in perspective.

Things We Can Do for God’s Missing Children

  • Pray for God’s missing children to return and be restored and pray for yourself not be tempted. Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Galatians 6:10
  • Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s leading when He may prompt you to go out looking for God’s missing child. I think sometimes that is one of the basis for having a visitation program, to check on those who have seemed to wander away from the fold. There are other ways in which God may prompt you, and I pray you will follow that leading, no matter how inconvenient or uncomfortable it may be.
  • Rejoice in their return. Many times we hesitate when someone walks through the church doors that we have not seen in a long time especially when we were there to give them counsel and they still did what they wanted or we were there when they were heartbroken needing help and they still remained. We wait in our own way to protect ourselves from what may be a “short-term turn-around.” Deal with them like God does, even if it is short-term, tell them you are glad to see them back and you have prayed for them. Treat them the way you would want to be treated if it was you.

I am thankful that when in my life I was the missing person that God never gave up on me! I  hope you can remember the ways God has done the same in your life and use those experiences to love God’s missing children.